So Still

This was about 9 days after Brayden's transplant...


So Still by Phyllis Woods Brown Wednesday, April 21, 2010 at 4:37pm

So Still…

You’ve been so still—while our hearts pounded in our chests
So still, while we sat and watched the monitors.
You’ve been so still—while the nurses scrambled to fix you, to ease you, to mend you, and the doctors spoke with quiet words.
You’ve been so still—not your normal wiggling self.
No noses being “beeped”, no ball held high over your head with pride,
No “Ma-ma”, “Da-ddy”, or “Dai-sy”.
No toothy little grins.
You’ve been so still—while we waited and waited,
And waited some more for 9 long days, and 8 long nights.
So still, so still, so…STILL!

You’ve been so still—while we willed you to move, willed you to improve,
Willed you to take a turn for the better.
You’ve been so still—while your Mommy brushed your hair, rubbed your back,
And cut your fingernails.
While your Daddy whispered quietly in your ear,
And your jungle monkeys danced a little dance in your music box.
So still, while we updated family and friends,
And pleas were offered up on your behalf.
You’ve been so still—while the Hands on the clock wound slowly ‘round,
Twelve, twelve, twelve, twelve twelve.
Midnight and Noon, Midnight and Noon.
Tuesday, and then Tuesday again.
And STILL you were still.
So stilll.


So still is my heart, now that you’re awake!
So at peace, so comforted, so rested!
And now that this is over, now that you are wiggling again, smiling again,
living again,
This I know, Brayden Jay:
You ARE my heart, and I will cherish you until the day that I am…

So Still.